Men and women VS A change in plans

I’m convinced that men and women will never agree on how to react to a last minute change in plan.

Now I do understand that it depends a lot on the type of person you are in general and not just on gender! I’m not ashamed to admit, I am quite an impatient person, it’s part of who I am, and I also detest change. I am a creature of habit, I crave security and when I make a plan you can be damn sure I will try my best to stick to it.

Being in a committed relationship with someone I consider to be an amazing man – handsome, loving, honest, kind, caring, funny, attentive – I find it so hard to keep on top of these bad traits of mine. He’s so great sometimes I genuinely feel bad if I get annoyed about what seems like trivial stuff.

We have never had a blazing row, we had calm discussions about three or four times in our relationship to point out what things were annoying us but all easily solved and rarely repeated…. Except this changing plans at the last minute thing. It’s come up now a few times and I feel like I have explained to him why it annoys me but today it’s happened again.

From early on we were so serious and spend almost all our time together, he practically lives here.. But it’s been a joy and everyday he has to leave for work or whatever he’s straight away saying he misses me or can’t wait to see me. But it’s happened once or twice before that his friend will text or call while he’s out and will ask him to do something. Now, being the normal happy girlfriend I am I would never stop him from meeting friends or family or going football or whatever, but if he’s made plans to return home to me or have dinner or whatever we have been texting about all day, it annoys me if he says he wants to actually go see his friend now instead, at an hours notice.

So I guess in my head it all sounds reasonable, you can’t be texting me saying you can’t wait to get home and then say you’re not coming back for a few more hours after all because your friend invited you over. I didn’t call my friends or arrange to do anything because you were coming here after work!? So you decide to change your plans cos it suits you but I’m gonna be left at home having not made any other plans? Is this being selfish or am I just trying to be fair to both. I wouldn’t and have never done this to him.

It makes me feel second best that I’m so easily discarded. I fully take on board we didn’t have much planned and we do spend loads of time together. I would just rather, instead of being dropped like a hot rock when something else comes up, that he thinks about it and maybe reschedules with the friend for the next day or something when he knows he’s free and hasn’t made plans.

So while I’m here getting all worked up and feeling like rubbish, he genuinely doesn’t see any issue I don’t think.. Like in his mind he was just gonna spend a few hours with a friend and then come down later than planned. Not a big deal right…

So are men and women programmed differently, do women take things more personally, or is this my issue completely?? Surely I can’t be alone in hating when people mess up your plans together in favour of seeing someone else?

Help me, please men and women of wordpress, give me your view and your advice.



Happy Birthday Mum

Today is my mums birthday and I am so gutted I can’t be there to celebrate with her and give her a hug and kiss. This is the second year I haven’t been there and I’ve decided that next year no matter what I will be by her side on her birthday.

We take our parents for granted so much while growing up. It’s only when you are living your own life, and can’t depend on your mum to be there at every step, that you realise how grateful you are. I am so grateful my mum did so much for me and tried so hard to keep me on the right path. I was a troublesome teenager I can admit but because of how she raised me I soon snapped out of my rebellious phase and knew I was worth more. And I knew she deserved more from me.

These days I really miss our everyday relationship, it’s so hard to not have a little chat everyday when I’m in and out of the house. I live alone (well just technically, as my boyfriend is here more than he’s not here!) and I miss knowing she’s downstairs to chat to while I make dinner or sit down and watch some TV.

As I get older and think about settling down and having my own family it kills me to think she’s not going to be there to see every day or be involved so much in my children’s lives if I remain in London. I guess I won’t know what the future holds but either way it just takes effort on both sides to make sure she is with me as much as possible or that I am with her. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for her and I hope she knows that. Good mums are actually not as common as you think and when I hear stories from other people about their mums or lack of mum, it makes me feel even more lucky.

I was raised to be a good, kind, honest girl. And that is 100% down to my my mum and her constant good parenting. I thank god everyday for her and I can only hope that I would be as good as mum as she is.

Happy Birthday Caroline xxxx





I love his Brown Eyes so much..

Remember the first day when I saw your face
remember the first day when you smiled at me
you stepped to me and then you said to me
I was the woman you dreamed about
remember the first day when you called my house
remember the first day when you took me out
we had butterflies although we tried to hide it
and we both had a beautiful night

The way we held each others hand
the way we talked the way we laughed
it felt so good to find true love
I knew right then and there you were the one

I know that he loves me cause he told me so
I know that he loves me cause his feelings show
when he stares at me you see he cares for me
you see how he is so deep in love
I know that he loves me cause its obvious
I know that he loves me cause it’s me he trusts
and he’s missing me if he’s not kissing me
and when he looks at me his brown eyes tell his soul

Remember the first day, the first day we kissed
remember the first day we had an argument
we apologized and then we compromised
and we haven’t argued since
remember the first day we stopped playing games
remember the first day you fell in love with me
it felt so good for you to say those words
cause I felt the same way too

The way we held each others hand
the way we talked the way we laughed
it felt so good to fall in love
and I knew right then and there you were the one

I know that he loves me cause he told me so
I know that he loves me cause his feelings show
when he stares at me you see he cares for me
you see how he is so deep in love
I know that he loves me cause its obvious
I know that he loves me cause it’s me he trusts
and he’s missing me if he’s not kissing me
and when he looks at me his brown eyes tell his soul

i’m so happy so happy that you’re in my life
and baby now that you’re a part of me
you showed me
showed me the true meaning of love
and i know he loves me

I know that he loves me cause he told me so
I know that he loves me cause his feelings show
when he stares at me you see he cares for me
you see how he is so deep in love
I know that he loves me cause its obvious
I know that he loves me cause it’s me he trusts
and he’s missing me if he’s not kissing me
and when he looks at me his brown eyes tell his soul

He looks at me and his brown eyes tell his soul

More job hunting

This whole online application process is getting soooo repetitive and boring.

I have literally applied for an average of up to five or six jobs per day the last few weeks, and I have had no replies for anything since the end of June! And even that was for a job I can’t accept due to the contracted hours being too low.

I really really need an income soon, my savings are going to run out this summer and I will be in such a quandary. I don’t want to leave London, I want to stay here and build a life with my boyfriend. If I run out of money it means I have to return to Ireland, with no money and no job and maybe no boyfriend… I can’t even comprehend. He says he will come with me if I have to go but I know he doesn’t really want to. It’s such a predicament I can’t stop thinking about it.

I need to go and read The Secret again and get some positivity top ups. I also might try some meditation because I need to calm my mind and not allow myself get panicky again.

Take a picture it will last longer

I am a photo maniac. I take photos all the time. I want to capture every beautiful memory, every funny occurrence, random things I see daily..

In this post I want to introduce you to some of the closest people to me right now by sharing a picture and a short story of our connection.

Firstly my mum…


In this picture my sister sent me of my mum she’s basically tried on her new swimming stuff and her and my sister got the giggles so bad they sent me a pic. I can see my mum laughing and in my mind I can imagine her and hear her and I know the way she can’t control herself when she gets giddy. It’s one of my favourite things about my mum, her ability to always laugh and have a joke around, even if it’s us mocking her sometimes! Absolutely amazing woman, I promise you that.

Next up is my boyfriend..


I cannot even begin to explain how he makes me feel. I have never loved someone more and I have never felt more loved. Since I was 15 I used to say I wanted someone exactly like him, it just took me almost 15 years more to find him! He ticks every box when I think about what I wanted in a man. I would do my absolute best to make him happy for always and I know he feels the same. In this pic we were in Blarney Castle in Cork, my hometown, with my best friend taking the pictures. It made me so happy to bring him home for the first time to meet everyone and he got on so great and he loved Ireland. He looks so cheeky in this pic and he’s just had his hair freshly done, everytime I see this pic I laugh at his expression but also feel those butterflies inside. He’s my Prince Charming and someday I believe he will be the father of my children.

Next up is who I now consider my best friend, the person I talk to the most and someone who isn’t afraid to tell me the truth about everything..


In this pic it was her first visit to my new flat in London (apart from her being here to help me find the flat in the first place!) and she got to meet my London girls and try shisha for the first time! It’s so great that we text and video call as much as possible, we never lose contact and we always know what’s going on in each other’s lives even if there is a sea between us. Growing up she was my younger sisters friend but we became very close when my sister and a lot of our other friends moved to Australia in the recession a few years ago. Turns out we are very similar, we enjoy the same things and we think the same way about stuff so it was a natural progression! Nowadays it feels unnatural not to talk daily and she’s the first person who knows how I’m feeling or what news I have. I quite like it and I’m just sorry that I had to leave her behind to be in London.

As I’ve grown up I have had plenty of friends come and go but there are some who no matter how irregularly we speak or how far away we are from each other, we will always have a lifelong connection.


In this picture the three of us were together for the first time in years. I had come back from London and E was back from Australia and we met in A’s to see her son and to hit the town. This photo is typical us, always having a laugh and messing around. I’m so glad we do still meet up even from all over the world. Some friends will always be in your heart even if they’re not in your daily life.

I have other friends and other family members but these right now are probably the most important. My two sisters mean the world to me but I can’t find a picture just now that does them justice. My mum and sisters are coming to see me in August and it’s going to be the first time we are all together in almost a year and a half. As my mum says, she can’t wait to have all her babies together again! So I’m sure there will be plenty of pictures next month and I will share the visit with you!

Dangerously in Love

You know what’s weird.. People don’t really want to read about someone being madly in love and deliriously happy do they!?

People have more time to read depressing news stories or negative comments, and everyone loves to get involved in social media dramas and arguments these days.

All I feel like doing lately is just posting about how in love I feel and how loved I feel. But I can’t do that. People just don’t want to know. They would rather hear you moan and complain about trivial things so they can feel like they’re not the only one experiencing negativity. I doesn’t feel safe to be broadcasting all this good feeling and positivity because it feels like someone somewhere will end up wishing you weren’t that happy. Someone out there is probably thinking I hope that smug bitch is taken down a peg or two.. Im not trying to rub anyone’s nose in it. I’m trying to share my happiness in the hope that if someone else can read it and be happy that they will also feel love in their life. The universe only attracts to you what you are feeling, so by sharing my love and others feeling happy then I feel like I’ve done a good thing for me and for them.

I’m in love. I feel loved in return. It’s something we both feel so strongly.. And have done since day one. It’s been six months now and it feels like I have never been without him. He literally ticks every box in what I dreamed to find in a man. I’ve waited my whole life to feel this connection, at some points thinking it would never happen and that stuff like this belongs in a romantic movie or book.

I used to blame Disney for giving us a false sense of hope about getting your Prince Charming and living happily ever after. Now I think I actually have found the prince, I just hope we get our happy ending and it lasts forever! Although it does bother me that Disney princesses never had to worry about rent and bills and unemployment! Hopefully those things are just a minor hiccup for me and we get the life we deserve with minimum dramas. I certainly don’t want to have to leave London and my other half might not be happy about relocating to Ireland too soon!

I guess once we stay positive and love each other than we can cope with whatever life throws at us!

Thank you very much

There’s a list of people in my head, and every night I thank the universe for them. I am so grateful to have them in my life to love me and support me.

My mum. My sisters. My nana RIP. My boyfriend. My dad. My best friends in Ireland. My best friend in London.

These people have changed my life for the better and they will continue to do so.